All the dates are approximate as it obviously hasn't been my objective to record every single move and word of the Orange staff. The story of the problem and my attempts to solve it are however quite accurate. Names of the staff are those that I had been given when requested.

22 June 2000
Have chosen Orange after being told that it had the best roaming and international facilities. Signed 1year contract.

30 June 2000
Decided to go to France. Called Orange to activate international option. Was told that I had to wait 3 months (another UK leading provider signed me up on the first day without deposit). Asked if I could put deposit in order to get roaming. Was told firm 'no'. The only option was to wait 3 months if I wanted it.

8 September 2000
Called Orange and asked to change me to the lower monthly payment option. Was told that the lowest option didn't include free insurance. Decided to go for option in between - the one that included free insurance but had lower monthly payment than my current one. Never really looked at the bills to check what had been really done.

30 November 2000
Broke antenna on the handset at my Brazilian party. Called Orange and asked for replacement. Was told that my plan didn't include insurance. Checked the bill and found out that I had been put on the plan with no insurance despite my request. Was told that since I couldn't prove that I asked for another plan I had to pay GBP20 emergency care fee and GBP60 pounds annual insurance. Said that I would leave Orange if compromise had not been found. Was told that GBP20 could be waived and GBP60 pounds could be paid by monthly instalments. Decided not to take the matter further and accepted their proposal. After that started to write down names of the Orange staff and dates I've spoken to them.

4 December 2000
New phone arrived with the letter saying 'please return your damaged phone in the jiffy bag enclosed in order to avoid penalty for non-returned phone'. Couldn't find any jiffy bag enclosed. Called Orange and asked for the address to send the handset. Was told not to worry and promised to be sent another jiffy bag that would have proper return address.

8 December 2000
Hadn't received anything. Called again to ask for the jiffy bag. Orange employee was surprised and told me that there was no jiffy bag request in the system. Was promised that this time it would definitely be done.

15 December 2000
Still hadn't received the bag. Called again. The story was repeated "…sorry there is no request for jiffy bag, but I will put it for you now. No Sir there is no need to escalate the problem to the manager - I've solved the problem for you Sir."

20 December 2000
New phone happened to be with the fault - display stopped working. Called Orange asked for replacement and TWO jiffy bags.

23 December 2000
Called Orange to remind about jiffy bags and to tell them that I would not be able to return handsets before 15th January. Was told that it was fine. Went to Brazil and had excellent 3 weeks without the need to worry about mobile, bills, and jiffy bags.

12 January 2001
Returned from Brazil, found that new phone had been delivered (no jiffy bags still) as well as the bill from Orange with penalty for non-returned equipment.

15 January 2001
Called Orange, spoke to Kelly, explained the whole story once more, checked December bill with her. She agreed that mistake had been made and asked me to pay only part of the bill - for the actual calls made and told me to ignore the equipment cost. Kelly promised to send the jiffy bags one more time. Paid part of the bill as I was instructed by Kelly. By that time I started to hate the phrase: 'Welcome to Orange - please listen carefully to the following 5 options'.

17 January 2001
Finally received jiffy bags and immediately sent both of the handsets back.

26 January 2001
Received January bill with TWO non-returned phones included. Called Orange, spoke to Zoe and made a bit of a scandal. Asked to transfer me to the manager. Zoe refused telling that the problem had been solved and there was no need to speak to the manager. Was advised to write a letter if I wanted to complain. Wrote a letter to Tony Adams - Collections Call Centre Manager.

27 January 2001
Received SMS on the mobile 'please call to 150 (general customer service number with famous options) regarding to your letter'.

30 January 2001
Received Final Reminder for December bill that hasn't been (obviously) paid in full from Tony Adams.

31 January 2001
Phone was cut off. Called to 150 and asked to speak to the manager. Staff, who introduced herself as Fiona, said that unless I told what the problem was they couldn't transfer me. Told the whole story again. Fiona replied that there was no need to speak to the manager since the problem could be solved by her and refused to transfer. She confirmed that equipment had been received and the bill would be corrected. I asked to speak to someone regarding my letter and SMS received. Was assured by Fiona that there was no need for that. Phone was turned on.

2 February 2001
Wrote another letter to Orange with complaint.

13 February 2001
Display on the handset stopped working again. Called Orange, spoke to lady who introduced herself as Loraine Tailor and asked for another replacement. Was told that it was not possible since I hadn't paid December bill. Was really angry but tried to calmly explain the whole story again. Was told that it was quite complicated issue and that Loraine needed to verify it with handset and billing departments. Mrs. Tailor promised to call me back. Never did.

14 February 2001
Called again and asked for Loraine Tailor. Was told that the name might be wrong or she might be working in another department. Lady introduced herself as Leana. She asked again what the problem was. To be completely honest was really irritated but tried to stay calm - almost successfully. Told her that I am not going to repeat the story again unless I spoke to the manager or Mrs. Tailor who already knew the story. Leana actually checked her computer and read to me aloud the story of the problem that apparently was in their computer system all the time. I had to go through the story little by little nevertheless. Leana confirmed that equipment had been returned and that the bill was wrong. She insisted that I pay the bill with deducted amount for non-returned equipment. The calculation happened to be too complicated and she couldn't understand why we kept coming to different amounts. Promised to call me back. Actually did! I almost fainted of happiness. She agreed to the amount I calculated and took the payment over the phone leaving my outstanding balance at zero. I asked to deliver the phone to the office and Leana promised to send jiffy bag this time with the phone. Wrote another letter to Orange asking for some sort of compensation. Left to Sweden for two days.

17 February 2001
Came to office and found out that the phone wasn't there. Called to Orange to find out that the phone had been delivered but couldn't be left because old handset wasn't available. Asked why I wasn't told to leave it. The man apologised and promised to send phone again on Sunday. I explained that I was not going to be in London and asked to deliver it on Monday. Was told that this service is 24 hours in advance ONLY and that I needed to call again.

18 February 2001
Called again to request delivery of the handset on Monday.

19 February 2001
Received handset and returned the faulty one.

20 February 2001
Wrote another letter to Orange hoping that it would be a last one.

21 February 2001
The phone was cut off again. Called to Orange. Was told that I have outstanding bill from December that hadn't been paid. Couldn't stay polite anymore and started shouting. Asked the staff to check what the bill included. 'Non-returned equipment' was the answer. Asked to check if handsets were returned. 'Yes' they were. Was told that I need to speak to someone with 'more authority'. Transferred to the 'authority' called Elaine. Explained 'authority' the whole story again and told her that I already sorted out everything with Leana and asked Elaine to confirm it with her. Was told that Leana is out of the office. 'Authority' told me that she would 'lift the bar' but I needed to call to the person I spoke before and to clear everything with her. Almost told the 'authority' to do you know what but instead just explained that if they needed to call me THEY should do it themselves.

22 February 2001
Wrote another letter to Orange and signed up with another UK leading provider . Phone started to work the same day, international option next day (no deposit).

23 February 2001
Registered www.hateorange.co.uk. Through away my orange jeans. Still shiver when I hear 'The future is bright…'

7 March 2001
Received new bill from Orange. This time non-returned equipment changes were dropped and I almost smiled when I noticed that they forgot my payment done over the phone just 2 weeks ago. The one we spent an hour calculating with Leana.

10 March 2001
Called billing department. Went through options before speaking to "Joe" who kindly advised me that my credit card was indeed charged on 14th February but the payment hadn't been allocated to my account for some reason unknown to her. Unfortunately she said 'our credit card department is closed today' and asked me to call on Monday. I innocently inquired if she can leave a message for THEM to call me back but was told that I need to call because they are not working today.

19 March 2001
Called billing department again. Spoke to Liam who unlike Joe was able to sort out the problem without the need for me to call to the credit card department or anyone else. Made payment with credit card again - just for the fun of it - for the remaining amount of the bill leaving outstanding balance at zero.
I love how they keep you on hold while you are paying about 20 pence a minute.

To be continued…